Saturday, August 12, 2017

The Secret Weapon

Tough, strong, weak and fragile. Bullets, death, nuclear bombs, life, survival, and fresh air. War, peace, win and lose. Power, rich and even poor. These are natural laws of physics, nature and almost every religion. Pain hurts and pleasure feels good. Good and evil; a common thinker knows that one cannot exist without the other. The cycle is eternal. Negative energy attracts positive energy and positive energy attracts negative energy.
Stay neutral.

Friday, August 11, 2017

The Addiction

I came across a video today that proves that there is a force trying to not only save me but save my fellow man and woman. We as a human species battle to be perfect at everything we do in life yet we often fail. Being a victim, I can only write about what addiction can do to those of us whom have not come out of the battle a winner. In the midst of my own failures, I too, must battle with the beast. This message though is not about me, it's about what I've seen.
I came across a video today that proves that there is a force trying to not only save me but save my fellow man and woman. There are forces trying to save us. On our journey to overcome our addictions, we often see a small sign that tries to warn us to take a better path, some heed the warning sign and some don't. Life on this planet is important, but those of us whom of which are addicted to something will tell you that strange things happen when you're alone and in battle with self. This message is simply only for you to follow the signs. I too have been a victim and battle with my own demons but to overcome is the only true miracle. Good luck in all of your journeys and may the creator of life strengthen you to find a place of peace so that you will not become a victim.
Testimony: Not to long ago I had the privilege of doing a fundraiser for addicts. At the fundraiser I got a call from my teenage cousin, the strange thing about this call is that I had never heard from her until this point, ever. The odds of her calling at that time were slim to none. When she called, I stood still like a rod in the middle of a moving crowd of people. We didn't have a good turnout from the show but I learned something that day. I later found out that she had overdosed but was brought back to life. I do not know why God has made my life this way and to this day I have no clue why she called. So many of the people I love are in chains. If you finished this post then you will have some idea of what a man who sits in a war zone has to do to win the battle. I know I'm not alone and I cannot save the world, but this post is only intended so that just like me you too can come across something that may save you. Follow the signs, there is a force trying to save us. I just joined and I'm now addicted to being a better person for the rest of my life.  

Monday, August 7, 2017

Angels

The faucet is leaking, I can hear it while sitting in silence on the floor in the other room. The singer taking a bath must have flown away. I guess everyone sings in the bathroom. I'm worried about certain things that I cannot control. Outside of these walls the world is still in motion, while ten million thoughts flow through my mind. It's a big world out there, beyond these walls. My neighbor must think I'm crazy from all of the laughter that goes on in a one man apartment. In all that laughter the room then goes silent. I become sadden by all of the evil that I have to face outside of these walls. It won't stop. I often wonder about the world. I wonder about the people. I wonder about myself. I then drift into a state of carelessness but I keep hearing voices telling me that everything will be fine. They've been in my ear my whole life. Then there's silence. In the silence I sit in a small corner holding the wings of a broken angel knickknack in my hand. Is that what we are? Are we humans just broken angels trying to fight our way back into heaven. In the midst of the voices, I see a light shining through the door. I feel a connection to the music now playing down the hall. I feel alive, I feel like flying. I feel like an angel. 

Sunday, July 30, 2017

American Intellect

Planting seeds on a corner, my mind then goes blank. I see two atheist collecting change to give to the saints.
I forgot how pyramids were built, so I plant a tree instead. 
I'm going in circles, then I bump my head.
I spent my last dime, so I'll earn another until the light turns red.
When I sit down and do nothing,  I'm pronounced dead.

Friday, July 28, 2017

Helping out the Devil

"A call just came in, sir, it seems someone wants to use you as a reference," Jane said to Peter, while keeping an eye on the clock.
"Where do you have to be Jane?" Peter asked, getting closer to her.
"How do you know I have to be somewhere? Jane replies, as though shocked by his question.
"Because you keep looking at the clock." Peter confirms.
It was evident that there was something on Jane's mind.
She seemed like an eagle on it's first flight day.
She had been with the same company for years. Why was today any different?
"Peter I need your help," she responded trembling. 
Peter fixes his tie.
"Now Jane, that's going to come at a price." He says.
"What?" She responds in disbelief.
Peter rubs his hand down her left leg.
"I told you, everyone in this business is a criminal. Your signature proves that you belong to me."
Feeling his advance, Jane just stands there shaking.
"But Peter, I have no one to turn too. I left my whole family to build your kingdom. Look at all we've accomplished together. I just need a break. Please." She says.
Peter proceeds up her blouse.
"Jane, you heard what I said, don't start developing a conscience now. You work for me. You see that punching bag over there in the corner. That is your dumb ass family and this golden elephant represents power, it represents intelligence. Do you want to go back there? There is no room for feelings in this business. The kind at heart get eaten alive and everyone else is a consumer, you know the rules." He takes his other hand and grabs her by the head, forcing her to kiss him.
"Do you understand that Jane?" He says forcing her lips on his.
Jane starts to have flashbacks of all of the family and friends she left behind to advance Peter's Corporate agenda. She remembered when she started, how ambitious she was. As Peter continued his advance on her body, that he had paid for, she stabbed him in the heart with her letter opener. When she stabbed him, he looked her in the eyes.
"Thank you... for setting me free," he said falling to the floor.
 Jane, covered in blood, looked at his desk filled with applications of people wanting to be just like her. She began to cry, her new life in hell had just begun, for she had slain the beast that helped her reach her dreams and there was no turning back. Jane then fell into the prison system and Peter's Palace Inc. was taken over by the next share holder in line. The only good that came out of helping Peter her whole life, was the lesson that Jane had learned when she was bailed out of jail by her family; whom of which, had nothing but their life savings.

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Perfection

I'm stuck in a state of thought after trying to get my lover to understand my logic. No one can feel what I'm feeling at this moment so I pick up a pen and a pad to ease my mind. I seem to be losing the perfect game. Am I human for my thoughts? Am I human for what I said? Am I human for what I did? I'm sorry, but it's too late, she left. I take a second to realize that this may be it for us, the pressure is too much to handle. If only love were perfect.
 I take my pen to write...
My thoughts begin to flow on paper, I have to find the words to keep me in a perfect state of thinking but it seems impossible. There are no words that can explain what I feel. I'm sorry, but she's gone. I breathe for a second...
If only these words could keep her in perfect harmony with me. I keep telling myself that pain can be healed but it takes time. Why is my heart beating fast? I have to keep writing to ease the pain? Somehow she is connected to my state of being. I need her but she left me all alone and all I have left is a pen to save me. She went out into an unstable world without me. I'm tired, so I let her go; realizing that I cannot protect or save her, I start to drift. I'm tired of trying to figure this out.  When I'm alone, I want her, but when  she's here, I want to be alone. Men lust to be with her. They stab me in the back. They lie. She lies. I have nothing left and no words to keep her happy. I'm losing her, if I haven't lost her already. Her last lover killed himself because he couldn't live without her. I look in the mirror and imagine a perfect world. It's the only hope I have left so I turn off the lights and lay in the darkness. It's quiet, the dream of a happy ending with her fades away, but at least tomorrow I have another chance to strive for perfection. I lost one. The pressure of trying to be the perfect man is over. The next day I wake up to the sound of birds and a bright morning sun. I have another chance.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Keep Trying

In my worn state of mind, I fall victim to the obvious quite often. I too, have seen failure. On a rainy day I see four children outside practicing dance steps. I'm assuming they must be preparing for an event. Me and my friend Jenn continue to sit on the porch and watch them dancing in the rain. After falling several times, they spot Jenn on the porch. They then walk over to my friend Jenn and ask her if she would train them. I guess they had heard about her after hearing that she was a local legend. Jenn, in her now older age, said no. From a small distance, I watched as the children proceeded to keep practicing. Feeling the magic of the situation, I proceeded over to Jenn.
"That used to be you," I said to her with supreme empathy for the children.
When Jenn heard those words, her heart became open to the future. She proceeded over to the children and began to teach them and they continued dancing.
It was their desire to not let her down.
It was their desire to keep trying.