At first I thought it was folks obligation to acknowledge me, but I later found out that in all reality, until you earn people's respect, no one really cares. They care, but it's like, it's not them, so why should they. Some people just hate you for just being you and there's nothing you can do about it, so why try, like I said there's nothing you can do about it, leave it alone.
I started having these strange thoughts after I saw people who lost their limbs in wars and later found out that drug dealers were shipping drugs in their coffins, my mind went blank after that. I guess some people lose their minds first and when you lose yours, then that's when they start asking for forgiveness. Has anyone seen my real father? I sure am glad someone stepped in and took over the load. I've always tried to be a good person, I don't know why a parent wouldn't want to be around me, maybe it was something else, something that I don't know about. I wish I had the money to pay back the man who stepped in, but I guess that's the great thing about sacrifice; I'll vote for him to make it to heaven, my heaven, at least.
I somehow made friends with a guy who tried to commit suicide because his wife left him and probed him for child support. After seeing him crying in the hallway and listening to his word selection on the phone with his ex-wife, I decided to get married myself. I didn't make it. I guess that's why everyone breaks the rules. At least I tried.
Two days later I saw this lady with no cloths on and decided to watch, I later was told that I had a chemical imbalance in my brain and shouldn't look at people who like to be naked in front of other people. I guess the corporations don't sponsor stuff like that because they can lose money. Once again, I lost one. I'm a sinner, I'm sorry but after it's done, it's done, and I can't go back and close my eyes. The thoughts won't go away, you know.
I decided to apply for a job but they told me I was too qualified so I decided to start building engines and selling them for a cheaper price than my competition. When I started making money I actually felt like a somebody, then my girlfriend got jealous because other girls were excited to see me. Strange things started happening when I started making money and somehow my engines were not the hottest thing on the market anymore. I guess that's the price of winning then losing.
I don't like hurting people but for some reason I couldn't help but notice people didn't mind hurting me. Oh boy, I'm on to something.
I tried to entertain the crowd, so I told the truth about how I felt and they booed me off stage and banned me from ever coming back and performing again. When I woke up the next morning, I felt like trash for getting what was on my mind out to the masses. They say honesty is an expensive gift. That maybe why I'm kicking the can down the road.
What really was the tipping point was the night when no one showed up to my event and went to my buddy James's event instead. He killed someone and I found out that he made a lot of money for what he did and for some odd reason people keep giving him more of their money. Um, excuse me officer, I think you may be arresting the wrong guy.
I started to feel paranoid when all of these people started asking me questions about my financial situation. I know there are a lot of people doing things that they shouldn't be doing and succeeding at it, but I'm broke and they keep bothering me. I wonder why, but it's fine, I enjoy the company. I guess I found my answer.
Sitting alone in a room every night, I start having these visions of what life would be like if I were not born, but it's too late, I'm here now, I have to make the best out of it.
After trying to reason with so many things that don't make sense, I just have to take it as it comes and that's how I lost my mind, I think. I may have lost it when I thought I was king of the world and everyone bowed down to my statue, nah, it may have been before that. I may have lost it when I realized that I had given everything away for free and found myself broke. Yelp, that's how I lost my mind, I lost it when I thought everything was free. That may be why I have to pay for this pill now, I have to pay for it so I won't forget to remind people that everything cost money, even my own medicine. And that's how I lost my mind, I lost it when I found out that everything comes at a price. A price that someone will eventually have to pay for.